Imagination at work

In recent days I have started to experience new and exciting changes with the natives; and as with any new experiences, some new lessons came in tow. Since the time of their arrival to the jungle the natives have always awoken early in the morning and then come straight into my cave to jolt me awake from my peaceful slumber. I have developed the ability to sleep very lightly and therefore hear any stirrings in the jungle even as I sleep. It doesn't make for a very restful sleep but it has come in handy the many times my immediate attention has been required in the middle of the night.

Since Christmas however a new routine is developing. It seems the excitement of new toys is more appealing then pouncing on their caretaker first thing in the morning. For me, what that means is 15-20 delightful minutes snug and warm in my bed with my eyes shut listening to the natives happily play in the other room.

Today I could hear them making each other “breakfast” with their Fisher Price kitchen set. I could hear them bustling around imagining to take each other’s orders and pretending to cook food for one another. What bliss to lay in bed listening to the happy sounds of natives interacting with each other. How inventive they were to be referencing the groceries we had just bought the day before. How sweet that they were trying to do like their caretaker, saying things like, “first add the flour, now the sugar”.  How nervous I was, when I suddenly tried to remember if I had put all the groceries away last night. I was tired, and I believe anything that didn't need to go into the refrigerator was on the counter, reasonably within their reach… (know where this is going yet..? Yep, so did I). And as I leapt out of my warm bed I discovered two small natives in my kitchen who had not “cooked” “breakfast” they had truly cooked breakfast… What can you do but smile? (And then spend the next hour cleaning up their culinary expedition). Looks like an early bath time for these natives today; and God willing, an early bedtime tonight for all. It’s going to be another long day in the jungle.



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December 28th

A break in the rain brought new hope to the jungle. However with the eldest native being ill with a head cold I thought it best to contain him to the indoor region for the day due to the frigid temperatures outdoors. This has made for some intriguing new observations of the natives. So often, if one falls ill, the other follows in suit. However at the present, the younger native is still in excellent health. This has created an interesting new dynamic to their social interactions with one another.

While normally the younger native demands more attention, in seeing his sibling ill he has taken on the role of caretaker. It is fascinating to watch the process. From what have observed I believe that he feels the best thing to do is to entertain his brother. This has involved different attempts to amuse him.

He first thought it would be humorous to use his cereal bowl as a hat. Unfortunately, this did not amuse the elder native (nor myself, as I was left with the duty of cleaning the assured mess that followed). When that didn’t work the younger native then tried using the opportunity of his caretaker (myself) being busy, to throw the bowl across the room. Impressively his feat of strength resulted in the shattering of his Corelle dish, (a nice looking dishware that is by all other accounts shatter proof; however to be fair I doubt even the strongest dishes were meant to be thrown across a room by an enthusiastic native).  While this did not amuse the elder native the younger creature was quite proud of himself, and believed that it was one of his superior displays.

Finally when these attempts failed the elder native retreated to his cave for some much needed slumber. As his caretaker busied herself with dishes and sweeping up the shattered bowl, the young native followed his sibling into his cave for a routine sure to make him feel better. I did not see everything that happened but through the crack in the doorway I could hear a native rendition of “Jingle Bells”, followed by “Rudolph” and finally by the younger native setting off all the noise making stuffed reindeer which resulted in 3 plush toys singing a round of “Grandma Got Run Over By a Reindeer”.

Though the attempts at entertainment may have fallen short where the elder native is concerned I am pleasantly surprised to see this companionate side of the younger native. After all, I cannot image the level of clean up that would be needed if he was upset with the elder native instead.

December 27th

Like his caretaker, the elder native has come to notice this year that he was in need of glasses.

I must say it’s an adorable look on him, I believe he uses it to his benefit; because as natives often do this young creature has many ulterior motives and giving a perception of a sweet innocent nature is just the lure needed to distract from his actual intent.

I have also discovered that taking both natives to the office where the glasses are made is one of the worst ideas I’ve ever had. However, I did ascertain that you get your merchandise made for you very quickly if you bring a small native who knocks down displays, tries on every piece of apparel in the store, and screams at the top of his lungs whilst spinning round and round on a chair as his caretaker tries to get his sibling to cooperate for a fitting.

The good news, we will be getting new glasses very soon for the elder native. The bad news, I think we shall need to find a new establishment to purchase glasses in the future.

Rain... Day 6

December 26^th,

Rain continues. After the chaos of yesterday I had plans of finding a safe place to retreat and regroup as the natives enjoyed the offerings found beneath the jungle’s aglow evergreen yesterday. However, as per usual in this suburban wilderness, the natives sensed a peaceful activity and worked quickly together to thwart that.  (Nice to see them work together though I suppose).

The eldest native did his part in making sure his caretaker was on his toes by deciding to snap his spectacles in two. This was truly and ingenious attack because it is twofold; for one it creates s sense of urgency for myself to get going on the day much sooner than I had planned. And two, it means taking both natives into the establishment in which they sell new spectacles. As I’m sure you can imagine, I am not looking forward to this excursion with much exhilaration.

The youngest is doing his part by covering every speck of the jungle floor with something, and anything. What one would never know from entering our jungle is that I spend a great deal of my day keeping the dwelling in order. Making sure that the natives have clean garments, good nourishments, and that their living space is in good shape.  And yet something that takes 4 hours to get looking perfect daily, takes between 4 and 14 minutes to utterly destroy for the younger native. It is almost a challenge to this young creature. For instance, it seems to be a rule to these natives that no window shall ever be clean. They have a ritual in fact; immediately after a window has been scrubbed the eldest rests his forehead upon the glass and drags it up and down to make streaks, whilst the youngest finds it more efficient to lick the entire surface of the window.

Regardless, it appears I am not meant to relax today; perhaps when the natives are grown… But for now they remain fascinating little creatures. Against my better judgment I shall continue to observe their native ways.

Must be off now, spectacles aren’t going to buy themselves, pray for me friends..

Twas the Night Before Christmas (Natives Style)

Twas the day before Christmas, when all through the house, the natives were stirring and scaring the mouse.

The stockings were hung by the chimney with care, then ripped off by the youngest whilst the oldest did stare.

The creatures were nestled but not in their beds, amidst the tornado of toys they rested their heads.

Mama watched in defeat while they refused to nap, but instead plotted to achieve the nice list without sitting on Santa’s lap.

 When out in the family room there arose such a clatter, I sprang from my desk to see what was the matter. The lights from the tree lying on the floor all aglow gave the luster of midday to the natives below. When what to my overwhelmed eyes should appear, but a stray cat whom the natives had let out of the cold to stay in here.

 To the top of the fridge to the top of the wall, scribbles of crayon from the youngest for all.

As I drew my head and was turning around, down came the garland without making a sound.

Their eyes, how they twinkled, they were plainly quite merry, with powdered sugar on their noses from the cookies and berries. They were jolly, I was sunk, those right jolly young elves and I laughed when I saw them in spite of myself.

The youngest spoke not a word but went straight to his work, unwrapping some presents then calling me "jerk."

Then running with ribbons and ripping up bows, acting quite oddly, down the hallway he goes.

 But I heard him exclaim, as he ran out of sight, my work here is done, love you mommy, night night.

From our Jungle to Yours,

 Merry Christmas.

Rain... Day 4

After the terrifying hostility observed yesterday afternoon I decided to call in the only reinforcements I have known to work in such cases. I have heard the natives refer to them as “Grandma and Papa”.

I decided to leave the small creatures in the care of those saintly visiting explorers while I take refuge in the land of the big people for 24 hours.

I felt this much needed break would allow me time to regain my strength to take on the challenges that surely awaited my return.

As I approach the end of my 24 hour pass I can’t help but feel a tad perplexed at where my time has gone. While I had planned to put my hours of reprieve towards some much needed “me time”; as my caffeinated sweet relief kicks in I am recalling the events of the evening. After helping a fellow caretaker for several hours I used the remaining time to prepare for the upcoming festivities. To be honest it’s a blur of red and silver with tape, screws and the occasional bolt thrown in, (because when at the establishment at which I purchased these supplies month ago “some assembly required” had the facade of simplicity. Yet as the clock struck 1:00 AM and words were flying only a sailor would approve of, I found myself, let’s say,  “slightly agitated” that I had made the decision some 2 months before that an extra $10 for the establishment to assemble all these offerings would just be plain frivolous. Yet another gold star for me on thinking it through…

It’s Christmastime in the jungle and this means hours upon hours of encasing more shiny noise making items for the natives, which they will of course later use to engage in a noise making battle with each other and possibly even in a bigger plot to overthrow their caretaker.

But as all of us in the suburban wilderness do, we must prepare for the arrival of the big man in red by pre-shopping, pre-wrapping and pre-baking for him; (hmmm why does this process seem familiar..?). Any way…

Regardless I shall spend my last hour of freedom as I always do, rocking myself, sipping my coffee and pretending to focus on fantasies of white sandy beaches while in reality making lists in my head of supplies to be gathered and tasks that are sadly not going to do themselves.

Rain... Day 3

Inside the indoor jungle with two small creatures.

 Up until today my observations of these young natives have been that typical of their kind. There were some struggles resulting in displays of aggression towards each other and sometimes even aimed at me, their caretaker. However their primal anger seemed to be calmed by foraging for treasures, building indoor shelters with locally gathered supplies and similar projects. 

 Today the tides have turned. While small in stature I observed a level of rage and destruction that would scare even the bravest of explorers to such a jungle. Even bribing the natives with treats has been met with a display similar to an enraged gorilla.

 I fear my only hope is to hide in a safe location within the jungle until such time as the rain subsides and the natives return to a state of homeostasis.