Tuesday, February 5, 2013

A Flash of Insight

Occasionally it becomes necessary to venture out of the jungle into the land of the big people. Typically when this happens I will leave the natives in the good care of the saintly visitors, “Grandma and Papa.” Sometimes, it is necessary for the natives to make the journey with me.

Last week I had to make such a journey to meet with a gathering of caretakers in the land of the big people. The gathering took place in an enclosed conference room with a lovely section in the corner of the room for the natives to play whilst the meeting took place. At first all went very nicely. The natives played quietly with the assortment of toys, they snacked on the food I had brought with us and colored in their notepads.
It was not until the natives had lured me into a false state of comfort that I heard one of the caretakers start to chuckle. Before I knew it the room had shifted their attention from the topics at hand to the small native in the corner of the room who was no longer snacking and coloring but instead was rapidly stripping himself stark naked. Before I could stop him he announced quite loudly that he had to "pee-pee" and marched himself to the bathroom at the other side of the conference room to take care of business. (You see back in the jungle the young native is allowed to run around sans-loincloth for ease-of-training purposes. Apparently I should have explained that out in public this is not the correct form in which to relive oneself.)
I had hoped this would be the end of the native’s displays. Unfortunately he then decided that being free of clothing was quite wonderful and saw no reason to re-dress. My insistence on the matter only sparked ear piercing screams from the young creature that could surely be heard throughout the entire campus. It took the promise of a libation for good behavior to coax the native back into clothing for the remainder of the meeting. Alas, another lesson learned for this caretaker; always be very specific when explaining the rules of potty training and clothing to natives. Oh, and, whenever humanly  possible, leave them with the saintly ones…


More Recipes for Restless Natives

In the Jungle it can be difficult to get the natives to eat proper nourishment. Here are a couple more recipes for restless natives:

Organic Zucchini Tots:

  • 2 Organic Zuchhinis
  • 2 Large Eggs
  • 1/2 Organic Yellow Onion
  • 1/4 Cup Monterrey Jack Cheese
  • Salt and Pepper to taste
Preheat oven to 400 degrees (F).
Oil two mini muffin trays with olive oil or unsalted butter.
Grate zucchinis onto a cloth towel. Wrap up the towel and wring out excess water; then empty contents into a medium sized bowl.
Dice onion and add to bowl.
Mix in cheese, seasonings and eggs.
Using hands or a wooden spoon mix ingredients making sure to coat everything thoroughly with the eggs.

Place a teaspoon full into each section of the mini muffin tray. Press down contents to pack them tight so they will hold together after baking.

Bake for 16 minutes. Remove from oven, cool and Enjoy!


Photo Credit: SkinnyTaste.com


Jungle Ice "Cream" (No Ice Cream Maker Required)

  • 5-6 Organic Bananas
  • 2/3 Cup Natural Peanut Butter
  • 1/8 Cup Cocoa Powder
Using a food processor or hand blender, blend all ingredients. Fold into Tupperware container, apply lid and put in freezer for 1 hour.
When it is fully chilled, scoop into bowls and Enjoy!


Photo Credit: EasyVegan.info